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[personal profile] darkdreamer
Hi, all :)

I've got updates for all three of my current fics today, wanted to get them up and posted before I go away for the weekend tomorrow. I hope you all enjoy them, and please let me know. Your comments keep me motivated to write, and honestly mean so much more than you think.

*hugs*
DoS


Title: Secrecy
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] misanthropicobs
Pairing: House/Wilson
Rating: PG
Warnings: basic dom/sub theme, nothing more this chapter
Summary: Things seem to be going great in House and Wilson's new relationship -- on the surface.


 

By the time Wilson awakened the next morning to get ready for work, House already had the coffee made, breakfast prepared, and himself ready for work. All in all, it seemed a miraculous transformation from his usual habit of sleeping until around ten and then meandering into work at his own pace.

When Wilson walked into the kitchen, House was sitting at the table, fully dressed, reading the newspaper and drinking a cup of coffee. A mostly untouched plate of food sat on the table in front of him, and a completely untouched plate lay in front of the seat across from him. House glanced up at Wilson without speaking as he entered the room. Wilson noticed that he seemed unusually quiet and subdued, but seemed to be in a good mood for so early in the morning.

Naturally, Wilson was suspicious.

"Good morning," he greeted House in a slow, wary tone, eyeing him skeptically as he poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table across from House. "You're up early."

House just nodded, a bit self-consciously, not quite meeting Wilson's eyes. "There's gotta be the occasional exception. Otherwise what would prove the rule?"

Wilson smiled with a slight nod, accepting House's evasive explanation as he took a sip of his coffee. He looked House over subtly, over the top of his coffee cup, and his smile of affectionate amusement faded into a concerned frown when he saw the nervous way House was tapping his left foot, and the way his right hand rubbed absently at his thigh – his anxious gestures belying his attempt at appearing calm and in control.

House had taken two Vicodin before going to bed the night before, so he wasn't likely to be in any great pain just yet -- but Wilson knew that he had probably been up for at least an hour already. By this point, House was likely starting to feel his leg's constant call for attention.

Wilson got up without a word and made his way to the bedroom. Taking the vial of pills from the pocket of his coat, he quickly shook them out into his palm and counted them to reassure himself that House had not taken any during the night, before putting all but two back in the bottle.

He walked back into the kitchen and stopped at House's side. He reached down to take House’s hand from the table, turning it up and placing the pills on his open palm. House looked up at him with an expression that was both grateful and uncertain, immediately tossing the pills down his throat and swallowing them dry.

Wilson rested a gentle hand on House’s shoulder, running a casual hand through his hair in a gesture of affection, before taking his seat at the table again and quietly resuming his breakfast. Neither said much, each simply taking his time waking up, mentally preparing for the day ahead – but the silence was not uncomfortable, and Wilson felt a sense of peaceful satisfaction and optimistic anticipation.

Looks like I made the right move last night, he decided with a private little smile into his coffee cup. He trusts me now. He believes that I’m going to do what’s right for him – and I will. I will, House. I promise. We’re going to be just fine.

*****************************

When House walked into his office that morning – on time, well-groomed, and actually humming cheerfully under his breath – well, naturally his team didn't take long to draw their conclusions.

"Funny... last time we saw him like this was that night he spent with his ex, before she left town."

Chase whispered his suggestive observations to Cameron when House walked out of the conference room and into his own office to hang up his jacket, but was disappointed when his remark only gained an irritable frown from his girlfriend, instead of the amusement he had hoped for.

Cameron didn't seem to be particularly thrilled with this latest development in House's love life.

Chase and Foreman, on the other hand, were just happy to see anything that put their boss in a better mood than usual, and therefore made their work day a little easier. If that "anything" happened to be a new romantic relationship with his best friend, well – that just made things all the more intriguing.

Ordinarily, the extra attention would have been an annoyance to House; but today, even the curious stares and whispered comments from his team couldn't shake his good spirits.

For once, things seemed to be going right in his life.

His uncertainties about Wilson's feelings for him had faded away under the power of Wilson's impassioned verbal and physical reassurances, and he found himself, for once in his unhappy and cruelly ironic life, actually venturing to trust another human being.

And if there was anyone in the entire world who might be deserving of that trust, House decided… it was Wilson.

Wilson had seen the best and the worst of him, in every possible way; and yet, Wilson had still accepted him, in all his infuriating imperfections – had promised that he loved him, that he would keep loving him, that he would do everything in his power to prove it. Throughout House's day, that promise echoed in his mind, reassuring him against the occasional doubts and uncertainties he couldn't quite suppress.

Of course, an impulsive mid-morning rendezvous in Wilson's office helped quite a bit as well.

Hurried, fevered kisses and urgent touches, tempered with all the gentleness and romance Wilson had spent the last twenty years perfecting, made House’s worries fade away into overwhelming affection and delirious desire.

Every word out of Wilson’s mouth seemed perfectly designed to quell his fears, to cement his confidence in Wilson’s intentions. Wilson seemed to anticipate House's doubts, and to be prepared for them, determined to do everything in his power to make House finally believe and accept that he meant every word of the promises he had made the night before.

Of course, House knew that it was intentional.

Nevertheless – it was working.

******************************

The next few days passed like a pleasantly hazy dream. House and Wilson were still in the “honeymoon phase” of their relationship, and neither could get enough of the other. They found themselves sneaking off at every available moment – during their workday, as well as after hours – to get a few minutes of privacy, away from the prying eyes of those around them, who lately seemed just as fascinated with their new relationship as they were.

House and Wilson were the talk of the hospital – but neither seemed to mind.

Wilson insisted on maintaining a certain air of professionalism during their working hours – at least, when they were where anyone could see; but that did not stop him from brushing his hand against House’s leg as they sat in the cafeteria eating lunch, or giving him a quick kiss as they parted for the rest of the afternoon, despite the curious eyes of the other hospital employees.

House found himself feeling a sense of pride at the glances people would cast his way in the halls, enjoying the knowledge that they knew he was taken – someone as respected and desirable as Wilson cared enough to want to be with him, to call him his own. It filled him with a pleasant sense of warmth and security to know that Wilson was comfortable being so open about their relationship, willing to let everyone around them know that they were an item.

House was surprised to realize that he didn’t even really mind allowing Wilson to dole out his Vicodin doses. After all, Wilson had kept him at the dosage to which he had become accustomed, and House found his fears of being subjected to the pain of having his medication withheld fading away, replaced by a growing sense of trust that Wilson did indeed have his best interests at heart.

That trust lasted until the day when Wilson decided to make the first adjustment to House’s medication regimen.

House showed up at Wilson's office at the usual time, feeling unusually cheerful, and noting with light-hearted amusement that he was just as excited about the excuse to see Wilson in the middle of his day, as he was about the pill he was there to get.

Wilson looked up from the papers he was working on, his dark eyes lighting up with affection as he gave House a warm smile and rose to come around the desk to greet him. As House came within his reach, Wilson leaned back against his desk and pulled House forward, slightly off balance, smothering his laughing protest with a fiercely possessive kiss.

House's eyes were hazy when he drew back, breathless, licking his lips as he glanced downward and held out his hand expectantly. His heart sank with instant apprehension as Wilson's smile faded, and the light in his eyes was replaced with anxious uncertainty.

"Let's wait just a few minutes," he suggested gently.

"I've already waited an hour and a half," House reminded him, an edge of warning to his voice.

"So fifteen minutes more won't kill you." Wilson's voice was patient, but firm, as he gave House a slightly stern look. "It's just fifteen minutes, that's all."

"So now I'm gonna get a pill every hour and forty-five minutes, instead of every hour and a half?" There was a trembling note of panic in House's voice, and he swallowed convulsively, visibly fighting to conceal his anxiety. "Don't you think that's a little too much too soon?"

"Yes," Wilson replied softly, his hands resting at House's waist and pulling him gently, insistently closer to him. His eyes were filled with rueful, subdued amusement, as he explained, "I do think that'd be too much too soon." He paused a moment before adding, "That's why we're not changing your routine that much right now. You'll get your next pill in an hour and a half... and the next one an hour and a half after that. It's just this dose that's changing. That's all. And we won't change anything else, not for a week or so at least. That should give your system time to adjust."

It sounded perfectly reasonable. It really, really did.

And House still found the idea terrifying -- because it meant that, although this particular change was very slight, almost insignificant... eventually, he would find his daily Vicodin allowance much more substantially reduced.

Wilson doesn't understand... He doesn't know how much I need it... how bad it hurts when I don't have it... He won't believe me, he'll say I just think I need it, just think it hurts because I want the pills, but I need them, I need them...

With an effort, House fought back his rising panic, covering it with a brave, forced half-smile, and a nod of resignation. His voice was just hesitant and uncertain enough, as he replied after a long, tense moment.

"O-okay. That... that makes sense," he agreed in a quiet, reluctant tone. "Whatever you think is best."

He inwardly cringed, wondering if he'd gone too far with those last few words, so completely unusual and almost comical coming from his lips -- but Wilson didn't seem to notice anything amiss. House suppressed a pang of guilt at Wilson's warm, grateful smile, as Wilson gave him an almost coy shrug.

"If you'd like, I could think of a few ways to... distract you, for the next fifteen minutes or so..."

House forced his concerns to the back of his mind, returning Wilson's fervent, impulsive kiss, trying to focus on the sensation of his touch as Wilson pushed him slowly, cautiously backward and then down onto the sofa. House shut out his swirling thoughts, the plans already taking place in his mind, and deliberately lost himself in the moment -- aware that Wilson would pick up on his distraction in a moment if he allowed himself to think about it.

Fifteen minutes later, House forced himself to hold his gaze when at last the younger man drew back, reaching into his pocket and taking out the vial of Vicodin.

"You're doing so well at this, House," Wilson told him in a soft, reassuring voice as he took out a pill and pressed it into House's hand. "Thank you. For... trusting me on this. I promise you, you're not going to regret it."

House just nodded, tucking his head self-consciously, before gently extracting himself from Wilson's embrace and rising to his feet. He waited until he was outside Wilson's office before taking the pill. He paused for a moment in the hallway, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep, shaky breath, before making his way with firm, purposeful strides toward the elevator and down to the lobby.

**************************

It was a simple matter to make his way across town to another hospital, and just as simple a matter to gauge the timing and staff of that hospital’s clinic so that he ended up with one of the younger, less experienced doctors working that afternoon. Within minutes of carefully innocent conversation, House had managed to procure a legitimate Vicodin prescription from the young doctor, and to get it filled at the hospital’s pharmacy.

It’s only for emergencies, he told himself as he tucked the prescription bottle into the fake book he kept on the bookshelf in his office, then carefully replaced the book, glancing anxiously over his shoulder to be sure he had not been observed. Only if I really need it, later on – once Wilson decides to move past the little, harmless changes and onto the bigger ones. I’ll only take them if I absolutely have to.

He left the pill bottle unopened in his secret hiding place, then checked his watch.

Time to go to Wilson for his next dose.

Everything’s going to be fine, he reassured himself as he made his way down the hall toward Wilson’s office. Wilson will never have to know...

TBC...



Free Hit Counter

Date: 2008-12-18 07:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaoskir.livejournal.com
Oh, oh! Well I can understand him. I would need those kind of reassurance too. Thanks a lot for the great new chapter. I do love those fic.

Date: 2008-12-23 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
thanx, hon, glad you liked it :) next one's up now :)

Date: 2008-12-18 07:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dawningmama.livejournal.com
Oh, House, honey, no. :(

Well done chapter! Can't wait for the next one!

Date: 2008-12-23 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
thanx, hon, glad you enjoyed the update :) *hugs* the next one is up now ;)

Date: 2008-12-18 07:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] isilinde1982.livejournal.com
Oh, I was afraid this was going to happen... Wilson just doesn't seem to get it. He really really should not try to control his lover's pain medication. It's heartbreaking that after everything that's happened he keeps on manipulating House like that.
House getting another prescription is totally understandable, I just hope he gets away with it.
Amazing chapter, as always.

Date: 2008-12-23 08:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, neither one of them is going about this right :( thanx, love, glad you liked the update... the nexxt one is up now :) *hugs*

Date: 2008-12-18 07:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jackssilverwolf.livejournal.com
Oh dear. I feel rather torn between the two. I feel for poor House, but at the same time, if just a fifteen minute delay can throw him into such a panic, he has a severe problem. They both have their work cut out for them.

Another brilliant chapter. Oh, I hope you have time to write more before next year, I know that holiday is approaching and all that.

Date: 2008-12-23 08:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, this isn't an easy situation for either of our boys :( thanx, love, glad you liked the chapter :) *Hugs*

Date: 2008-12-18 08:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] menolly-au.livejournal.com
Oh dear, I guess sweetness and light isn't ever going to last long on House :) And Wilson, you really ought to be suspicious when House says 'whatever you think is best' lol!

Date: 2008-12-23 08:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
lol... yeah... but....

what makes you think wilson's *not* suspicious? ;) hehe...

thanx so much, hon, glad you enjoyed the update :) the next one is up now :) *hugs8

Date: 2008-12-18 08:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jadzia7667.livejournal.com
Eeep. There's gonna be punishment at some point for that bit, yeah? I like the honeymoon phase of their relationship very much, and that House feels a bit of security, however fragile it is. Wilson needs to be keeping an eye on him...but I bet he'll screw up a bit, too.

Excellent work, as always :)

Date: 2008-12-23 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
oh yeah, these boys wouldn't be *them* if they didn't screw it up :P lol... glad you liked this update, hon :) *hugs* the next one is up now :)

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-12-24 04:30 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2008-12-18 08:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hilsongirl.livejournal.com
Fear of pain van make you do that kind of thing. Poor House.

Date: 2008-12-23 08:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah it can... but this is not going to be good :P thanx, hon, glad you enjoyed the update.. the next one is up now :) *hugs*

Date: 2008-12-18 08:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 2801rosie.livejournal.com
UUHHHHH House, you know you're gonna get caught!!!!!!!!!!!
Poor House, he doesn't see the evil in Wilson as we do :(
Great update!!!!

Date: 2008-12-23 08:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
hehehe... yeah, he's definitely gonna be getting in trouble for this one :P thanx, hon, glad you enjoyed the update... the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

Date: 2008-12-18 08:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] madwriter223.livejournal.com
There's this thing about secrets - if it's a big secret and the longer one's keeping it, the bigger the explosion when it's out of the bag.
The trust is still not all there, Wilson.
I've always found this really odd for doctors to do (as in Cuddy and Wilson) - to take away pain meds when they have no freaking idea and no way of knowing how much it really hurts.
That wasn't opposing to your fic, I like how this is progressing. Just had the urge to share. ^__^'

Date: 2008-12-23 08:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, cuddy and wilson neither one understands what house really goes through :( and yeah, this secret will not posssibly be a good thing :( glad you enjoyed the chapter, hon :) *hugs* the next one is up now, hope you like :)

Date: 2008-12-18 10:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morinen.livejournal.com
Loved the ending. I can see House doing just that.

Date: 2008-12-23 08:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
thanx, hon, glad you found it believable :) *Hugs* the next chapter is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-18 11:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vurt-junkie.livejournal.com
Oh Wilson! Now even if House never takes the pills it will make him look like an addict who loves pills more than Wilson. And if he does take the pills...well, I'm sure it won't come to that...*cue dramatic music*

Date: 2008-12-23 08:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, this reeally makes him look bad :( big mistake, but too late now :P thanx, hon, glad you enjoyed the update... the next one is up now :) *hugs*

Date: 2008-12-19 01:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miakiburia.livejournal.com
Very sweet :3 I don't blame House for his deception, but I wonder if he'll take those pills...

Date: 2008-12-23 08:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
we shall see :P thanx, love, glad you liked the update :) *Hugs* the next one is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-19 02:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jennybliss.livejournal.com
*hugs House* Oh, House, don't you know that you can't keep things like this from Wilson. He really does want what is best for you.

House has to talk to Wilson about this.

Great new chapter!!

Date: 2008-12-23 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, he does... and he's not going to be happy about this :-S... thanx, love, glad you liked the update :) *hugs* the next one is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-19 02:27 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
oh no! Oh, no! OH, no!!!!

Date: 2008-12-23 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yep... this could be bad :-S

thanx, love, glad you liked the chapter... the next one is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-19 02:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] arhh.livejournal.com
House, don't you know Wilson WILL find out? Of course, I think he wants Wilson to find out, partly to get help and partly to get punished :) Thanks for sharing :)

Date: 2008-12-23 08:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, but he might find the punishment isn't quite what he expects :-S ... thanx, love, glad you liked this chapter :) *hugs* the next one is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-19 02:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bookfan85.livejournal.com
I'm expecting House to be geting some spankings once Wilson finds out. We know Wilson will eventually find out.

Date: 2008-12-23 07:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, house won't be able to hide it for long :-S... thanx, love, glad you liked the update :) *Hugs* the next one is up now :)

Date: 2008-12-19 07:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mireya-11.livejournal.com
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HOUSE DON'T!
HE'LL FIND OUT
AND YOU'LL GET INTO TROUBLE T____________________T

Date: 2008-12-23 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yep, definitely :(

thanx, love, glad you liked the update :) *Hugs* the next one is up now :)

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] mireya-11.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-12-24 01:00 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2008-12-19 08:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] evila-elf.livejournal.com
For once, things seemed to be going right in his life.
And this is the first sign that something will happen to change all the rainbows and kitties lol.

I really hope House can keep away from his new 'only for emergencies' stash....but I have a feeling it will backfire.
Ack!

Date: 2008-12-23 07:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
lol... love you shiny optimism, love ;) hehehehe... *hugs*

but you're soooo right...

glad you enjoyed this chapter, the next one is up now :) hope you like :)

Date: 2008-12-19 09:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zamaza.livejournal.com
House, you IDIOT! Though I'd honestly do the same thing. Fear is an incredible motivator.

Date: 2008-12-23 07:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, it definitely is, and his motives are quite understandable... but this can only lead to badnss :P thanx, love, glad you enjoyed the update... the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

Date: 2008-12-19 01:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] myene-01.livejournal.com
O house! And you were doign so well!

Still, I guess as long as he isn't taking them...but when Wilson finds out he will be one sad/mad puppy.

Date: 2008-12-23 07:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yep, wilson will definitely not be pleased :P thanx, love, glad you enjoyed this update... the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

Date: 2008-12-20 01:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] feanix.livejournal.com
Oh, Greg.

But I understand his need...Must be so hard for him to have Wilson in control.

Date: 2008-12-23 07:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, it's very hard for him to surrender control to anyone, ever, and especially in regards to his pain meds :( thanx, love, glad you enjoyed this update... the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

Date: 2008-12-21 02:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hang-monet.livejournal.com
Oh House...you and your insistence at being a believable drug addict rather than just magically recovering overnight like you managed when your leg got better on the show...*sigh*

Wilson's so blatently doing the right thing, too. I hope he allows more leverage (pun not intended) about the addiction, there's a reason it's called an addiction after all. Come on, boys! I'm sure the human condition's great an' all but we need more naughtiness.

I can't wait for more, which seems a terrible thing to say when you right so fast. I do love your writing.

Date: 2008-12-21 02:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hang-monet.livejournal.com
*write.
I'm going to stop commenting after I've read your new fic, I'm just too drunk.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-12-23 07:28 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-12-23 07:32 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2008-12-23 09:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lhoma320.livejournal.com
Oh Lord! This was the best ever. I loved the way you handled House when Wilson tells him he can wait 15 minutes. Loved the line "There was a trembling note of panic...". Also loved "I need them, I need them...".

The absolute best part was House going to another hospital clinic to get a back up just in case. The last line "Wilson will never have to know..." gave me the creeps because you know Wilson is going to find out. Oh, I can't wait.

Date: 2008-12-26 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yes, wilson is definitely going to find out... and house is going to be in trouuuble :P glad you enjoyed this, hon, and liked house's reactions when he was told he was going to have to wait for the pill... it wasn't so much that he thought he needed that fifteen minutes difference, as just that he's afraid of where it will lead from there :P *sigh*

anyways, glad you enjoyed it, hon :) *hugs* the next chapter is up now, hope you like :)

Date: 2009-01-28 06:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] moz17.livejournal.com
Oh dear. This can't end well. And I know Wilson has the best intentions and his heart is very much in the right place, but somehow, I think this may not end so well...*worries*

Date: 2009-01-29 04:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamsofspike.livejournal.com
yeah, house is definitely making a mistake in hiding the pills, and wilson has made a lot of mistakes thus far :-S ... this could be bad :P thanx so much, hon, glad you liked this update :) *hugs*

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