#18 in the Leverage!verse, Pain

[darkdreamer]

Hey, guys, hope your holidays are treating you well :P I'm trying to take advantage of the few days I've got before the next (and thankfully last) of them gets here by getting some updates out. I hope you enjoy the two I have for you today. Please let me know what you think :)

*hugs*
DoS


Title: Pain
Beta: misanthropicobs
Pairing: House/Wilson
Rating: R
Warnings: violence, dom/sub themes
Summary: House's punishment is meted out... with a rather surprising twist.

 

Wilson stood looking down at House in silent expectation, waiting for House to obey his command to stand in preparation for his punishment.

House just sat there, staring up at him in wide-eyed apprehension -- making no move to stand.

"I'm... not sure this is a good idea right now," he objected after a moment, his voice small and subdued, with just the slightest hint of a tremor. "We still have the whole work day ahead of us. If I'm in... too much pain, I... I won't be able to do my job..."

"Oh, yeah," Wilson retorted with mild sarcasm, a single dubious brow raised. "All that sitting and thinking... so much harder after..." His voice trailed off, his expression shifting into a thoughtful frown, as he realized the unintentional truth of his words. "Actually... I guess it... might be." He shook his head, squaring his shoulders as he glared down at House again, struggling to harden his demeanor against the rising panic he saw in House's wide, vaguely pleading eyes. "But punishment isn't supposed to be easy, House..."

"Someone might notice."

There was just the subtlest suggestion of warning in House's too-innocent voice, and Wilson's lips tightened into an angry line as he took an intimidating step closer to where House sat on the sofa.

"Is that a threat?"

As he spoke, he tapped the crop into his palm impatiently, feeling a twinge of guilt when House flinched slightly, swallowing hard, his breath quickening with alarm. He shook his head emphatically, closing his eyes for a moment before looking up to meet Wilson's challenging gaze.

"No," he answered softly. "No, it's... not a threat. Just... I'm just saying... I might not be able to... to hide it... all day... if I'm in... too much pain."

Wilson's brow creased in a pained expression of sorrow and regret that he swiftly wiped from his face, trying to maintain a hard, resolute demeanor. Despite his efforts to remain firm, however, he found himself wondering about the wisdom of his own methods, and whether or not he might be doing more damage than good.

Just how much pain does he expect me to put him in?

"You're not going to be able to put this off forever, House," he stated, his own voice trembling slightly in his confusion and frustration.

"I know." House nodded, his eyes downcast in an unusual expression of subservience and respect. "It's just... if we could just... wait. Until... until we get home..."

Wilson was silent for a long moment, caught in his own mental war between merciful reason, and a stubborn desire not to yield. Finally, his shoulders slumped slightly as he relented with a heavy sigh.

"Fine, then. Until we get home." He paused, waiting until House met his eyes in a grateful, relieved nod before continuing, "But only until then. This will be dealt with before we go to bed tonight. Is that clear?"

House nodded again, a nervous, convulsive swallow in his throat, but did not voice the fears that were so clearly visible in his expressive eyes. As he placed two Vicodin in House's palm and watched him make his way out of Wilson's office and toward his own, Wilson felt a tight knot of dread beginning to form in his chest. He knew that, as much as he was not looking forward to what he would have to do that night, that unpleasant knot would not be going anywhere until he had finished the unpleasant task that lay ahead of him.

Evening could not come soon enough.

******************************

At the end of the day, Wilson found himself lingering in his office. Every time he was about to leave, some little thing he'd left undone managed to catch his attention -- until finally, he had to admit to himself that he was subconsciously searching for excuses not to go home.

When he passed House's office on the way toward the exit, he was unsurprised to see that House had already left for the day.

Guilt and confusion and uncertainty consumed Wilson's muddled thoughts as he made the short drive home -- which seemed even shorter than usual on this particular night. He stopped outside the door to the apartment, drawing in a deep, shaky breath in an attempt to steady himself before walking inside.

House was seated on the sofa, watching television. When Wilson entered, he did not look up, did not give any indication to even acknowledge Wilson's arrival -- but a slight wince and a slow swallow in his throat betrayed his rising apprehension.

"Hey," Wilson said by way of nervous greeting.

"Hey," House echoed, apparently very interested in the sitcom on the television.

Wilson almost laughed aloud at the absurd normality of the exchange. There was nothing normal about what was about to happen in the next few minutes.

And it had to be the next few minutes -- because Wilson was afraid that if he didn't do this quickly, he would give in and not do it at all.

"Stand up," Wilson ordered softly as he took off his coat and hung it on the coat rack, setting his briefcase down on the coffee table.

House reluctantly obeyed as Wilson opened his briefcase and took out the crop he had chosen earlier that day. His every motion was slow, filled with clear dread, as he braced his trembling hand against his cane and slowly stood, eyes downcast, shoulders taut with nervous tension.

Wilson closed his briefcase and stood up straight again, holding the crop between his hands as he met House's eyes with a firm resolution.

"Take off your shirt."

House looked surprised at that, raising his eyebrows skeptically. "What, you've decided against a proper spanking?" he observed. "Decided I deserve a little worse than that?"

Irritated by House's assessment of his motives, which was painfully inaccurate, Wilson snapped, "Actually, I was thinking that making you take your pants off and spanking you like a child is a little more demeaning than I want to be to you." His voice softened, his expression pained as he added, "Also... I don't want to take a chance of... of hitting your leg."

A brief flash of some indiscernible emotion crossed House's face, but he quickly squashed it back, his jaw set in stubborn defiance as he retorted with scathing sarcasm.

"Yeah. You've made it totally obvious how very concerned you are with my personal dignity."

"House." Wilson's voice was sharp, warning in his anger and frustration. "This is hard enough as it is. Would you stop with your smart ass comments and just do as you're told?"

The instant the words were out of his mouth, Wilson inwardly cringed, aware that his tone and choice of words only served to support House's accusations. He steeled himself, prepared to hear House voice just that observation, and most likely in the most harsh and insulting manner possible.

What he was not prepared for was House's slight flinch, his reluctant but quietly submissive answer.

"O-okay."

Wilson felt a hot, sick rush of guilt fill his stomach as he realized that House had probably heard almost exactly that same order before, a very long time ago. He sighed wearily, raising a hand to run through his hair in repressed agitation, as he tried to rein in his own confused emotions enough to give House the reassurance he needed.

"House," he said softly, with renewed patience, "you're wrong about this, okay? I'm doing this because I care about you. I don't want to hurt you. I just want you to know that you can't do this again. Do you understand that?"

House's eyes were downcast, refusing to look at Wilson, but he nodded once, slowly.

"If this is going to work... you're going to have to trust me. Okay?"

Another terse, silent nod.

"You can't be going behind my back, attempting to deceive me and subvert my every effort to..."

"Can we just get on with this?" House snapped impatiently -- but his voice trembled slightly, betraying the apprehension that was the real source of his upset.

Wilson was quiet for a moment, studying House's expression, before nodding slowly. "All right, then," he agreed quietly. "I want you to stand in the kitchen doorway and hold onto the door jamb."

House obeyed with short, halting movements, visibly trembling, his hands white-knuckled as he slowly, awkwardly gripped the edge of the doorway. Wilson followed him with measured, patient steps, stopping when he stood a few feet behind House.

"I'm sorry, House," he said softly, his voice thick with his own threatening tears. "I... didn't want this to have to happen."

Wilson’s hands were trembling, and his brow broke out in a cold sweat as he tested the weight of the crop in his hand, giving it a brief, experimental swing, gauging the amount of force he should use. Finally, he steadied himself, blocking out his thoughts and feelings of guilt and uncertainty, telling himself that he had to just do this – or he wouldn't do it at all.

The first stroke fell with a thick, sharp, slashing sound, and House's back arched away from the painful sting of the swift, red welt that formed in its wake. Wilson bit his lip so hard that he tasted his own blood, his vision blurred with tears as he drew back the crop and struck the second blow.

House bit back a cry of pain, his hands jerking against the doorjamb as his shoulders began to shake slightly. He was struggling to maintain his composure, unwilling to allow Wilson to see how much it hurt.

With the third blow, however, his resolve was nearly undone. The muffled, strangled cry died in his throat, but it was audible enough to tear at Wilson’s heart, filling it with a sharp ache of regret and sorrow for what he was doing to his friend and lover.

By the time the fifth and final blow fell, House was leaning heavily against the doorway, shaking hands clinging to the door jamb, his back criss-crossed with the livid red stripes from the sturdy riding crop. Wilson immediately dropped the weapon to the floor, moving swiftly to House's side and wrapping a gentle, steadying arm around his waist.

"Shhh," he murmured. "It's all right. It's finished, now..." House glanced up at Wilson uncertainly -- then did a sort of surprised double take before looking abruptly down again.

It was only then that Wilson realized that his own face was streaked with tears.

House was trembling violently, choking back a sob of pain, but unresisting as Wilson led him slowly and cautiously to the sofa. He helped House to sit down, taking a seat beside him as he did so, running a soothing hand through his hair.

"It's okay. You're gonna be fine," Wilson gently assured him, guiding him into position with his elbows braced on his knees, leaning forward to prevent any painful contact of his back against the leather of the sofa behind him. "I'm gonna take care of you. You're gonna be just fine..."

Wilson made a hasty escape to the bathroom, taking a moment to catch his breath and try to regain his composure in the quiet privacy of the room. He had never felt so guilty, so disgusted with himself, in his life.

He hastily swiped at his tears, blinking away their remnants as he reminded himself that House needed him. He couldn't focus on his own self-pity right now.

No… time to deal with the damage you've done.

Wilson took his time, his hands gentle and tender as they moved with careful precision over the wounds he had inflicted on House's body, treating them with antiseptic cream and covering them with soft bandages.

House was quiet, withdrawn and subdued. He was still shaking slightly, and refused to make eye contact with Wilson, seemingly utterly at a loss as to how to respond to Wilson's affectionate concern, in sharp contrast with the authoritative violence of his previous actions.

When Wilson was finished, he set the first aid supplies aside on the coffee table, and turned to face House, reaching out to tentatively take his hand. Wilson's heart lurched when House's hand tensed under his, but he persisted, reaching out an arm to wrap around House's shoulders, pulling him gently but insistently closer to him.

"I'm so sorry this happened, House," he whispered.

"No, you're not," House muttered, jerking away from Wilson's attempted embrace with an immediate wince of pain at the ill-advised movement. "If you were sorry, it wouldn't have happened."

Wilson withdrew his hands, his head bowed, silently accepting House's feelings, unwilling to force his affection upon him. He swallowed hard, blinking back fresh tears at the -- albeit understandable -- rejection. He hesitated a moment before reaching into the pocket of his pants and taking out the full vial of pills he had confiscated from House's secret hiding place.

"If... if this is going to work," he began in a slow, hesitant voice, holding out the vial and pressing it into House's open palm. "Then... trust... has to be mutual."

House looked down at the vial in his hand, then up at Wilson's face in startled confusion, a question in his wide, red-rimmed blue eyes.

Wilson met his gaze, his own solemn and unflinching. "I want to... to try to trust you, too, House... in spite of what's happened," he explained. "I'm... giving you these pills to hold. Like you said... just in case. But... but I expect that if you... start to have doubts again... if you think you might need to actually take some of them... you'll... you'll talk to me, first?"

House stared down at the vial in his hands, processing what Wilson was saying. After a moment, he nodded slowly.

"Whatever the problem is that you're having," Wilson continued, "I want us to talk about it... to see if we can solve it, first, before you resort to taking the extra pills." He paused, carefully weighing his words as he concluded, "I'll trust you not to actually take the pills without discussing it first... if you'll trust that I really, truly care about what's best for you, House -- that I'm doing this for you."

House just stared down at the prescription bottle, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with Wilson's words. Finally, he slowly closed his hand around the bottle with an almost imperceptible nod. Wilson smiled, his shoulders loosening slightly with relief, as he leaned in to press a tender, chaste kiss to House's temple.

Without another word, he rose and walked away -- leaving House to spend some time alone with his own thoughts.

TBC...

Accident Lawyers

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

wilson makes me sick. this sort of punishment is not acceptable. why does it have to be physical punishment? hasn't house received enough of that when he was growing up? he shouldn't have to put up with this sort of thing. he should put a stop to it and kick wilson to the curb.

i mean, don't get me wrong, your stories are great, but this kind of punishment...is just not cool.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

no, considering house's past, this might not be the best idea on wilson's part :( but house *is* consenting to it... still, it's tricky... don't worry, though, things will get better soon :P

the next one is up now, love, hope you like it :)

*Hugs*
DoS

[myene-01.livejournal.com]

Well, unlike A.Nony Mous, I liked it. It is very diffrent from child or domestic abouse (he was given several chances to say no, picked the punishment item, and was allowed to change the punishment time and place). Mind you, not that i'm a big fan of copral punishment, but this was two consenting adults.

and I was right about the pills...kinda...yea!

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

hehehe... yeah, you were close :) hehe... and yeah, this isn't quite the same as like, domestic abuse... even though the power dynamic here isn't necessarily what it should be :-S...

thanx, love, glad you enjoyed this update... the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

[amproof.livejournal.com]

I like seeing Wilson as a dom who is concerned for House, but I have to agree with Anon above--Wilson doesn't have a clue what he's doing. House is giving off enough hints already that he's been traumatized by physical 'discipline' in the past, and even if Wilson sees a difference between what he's doing and what happened before, House cannot make that distinction at this point.

It was interesting to read it from Wilson's p.o.v., but I was furious at him for leaving House alone even for a second after the beating.

Wilson needs to figure out another way to help House that doesn't involve beating him--at least until they have legitimately developed that trust enough where House could see a difference between Wilson disciplining him and whatever his dad used to do. (Assuming it's his dad, that is.)

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, it's his dad, as per canon :(

and yeah, wilson isn't really handling this right at all... poor house doesn't really have much of a choice in this situation, despite the fact that he's *technically* consenting :(

glad you enjoyed this update, love, the next one is up now :) hope you like :)

[slashfan54.livejournal.com]

This is great. Well in a twisted sort of way. House is paying more mindful attention to this than he ever has to anything in the past.
Wilson is at his wits end, trying any crazy thing he can think of to save him. Don't know if he's right, but he doesn't seem to enjoy beating him so that's a plus. I think House's Dad got off on it, mine sure did.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson definitely is not enjoying hurting house... he's just trying to save him... :( but he' not doing a very good job of it...

glad you enjoyed this update, love, the next one is up now, hope you enjoy :) *Hugs*

[arhh.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Another great installment. There is a difference between getting a beating from someone who is out of control with rage or just enjoys beating someone to control them and receiving corporal punishment the way Wilson did and has been doing. A very big difference and I think you get that point across very clearly- it was obvious Wilson was just as reluctant to administer this punishment as House was to receive it, but in order for the discipline to mean anything Wilson had to do it.

I don't think it was bad that Wilson gave House some alone time after either. He took care of the wounds and talked with House. I loved it when Wilson gave him back the vial of pills, it has been a bit one sided thus far with the trust and I am glad Wilson seems to be learning as much as House is.

Anyway, I am rambling- thanks again and look forward to more of this *hugs*

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, i tend to feel the way you do about it... no, wilson is not doing everything perfectly... but neither is he intending to hurt house... he's trying to help him, and there was a big difference in the way he administered this physical discipline, and the way an abusive situation might have been...

glad you enjoyed the chapter, love :) *Hugs* the next is up now, hope you like :)

[hilsongirl.livejournal.com]

I wish Wilson would find a different way to punish House...

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, that might be better, considering house's past :( thanx, love, glad you liked the update.. the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

[chaoskir.livejournal.com]

Oh Wow! I guess House wouldn't expected that Wilson will give him the pills. Trust? I'm wondering that House should be able to trust someone. I mean with his past and his abusing in his past and then what Wilson has done to him, now? Wow! Great story. I enjoy every new chapter. Thank you a lot for sharing.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, trust comes with difficulty, if at all, to house, and wilson's not going about this right, but he *is* trying... he doesnt want to hurt house...

glad you're enjoying the story, hon, thanx so much :) the next one is up now :) *Hugs*

[(Anonymous)]

This was fantastic!

I can not wait to read the next chapter.

Wilson is really trying to help House, even if House doesn`t quite understand it yet.

At the beginning I thought the punishment on the back was quite brutal, but the longer I think about it the more I think it was OK.

Giving House the full vial of pills back was a very clever move. I love it.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, he didn't go overboard really... five strokes i dont think is excessive... but for house, any at all is a big deal because of his past.. this is a very complicated situation for both of them... glad you enjoyed this update, love, the next one is up now :) *Hugs* hope you like :)

[catgirlpoison.livejournal.com]

Well, another great chapter. Even though I was cringing at Wilson, I know that he's trying to get his point across to House. Still I hope he finds another way to discipline him. Speaking from past abuse myself, there's nothing like that form of punishment for adding to a person's trust issues. I'm trying to see things from both sides of the story. House and Wilson. Loving your work. Big hugs.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson's definitely making some mistakes here :( glad you're enjoying the story, though, love :)*Hugs* the next one is up now :)

[llumik.livejournal.com]

This was great, you got Wilson's consern and emotional stress through very well. Excellent update. Has Wilson maybe thought about doing some small (online) research on this? Because you can really feel his confusion. :D

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, he definitely should have studied this out more before getting into it :( glad you enjoyed the udpate, love :) *hugs* the next one is up now :)

[madwriter223.livejournal.com]

...damn. I'll repeat myself - Wilson you asshole.
I know, I know. Wilson's doing this because he cares about House, and he wants this whole thing to work. Overlooked one tinee, tiny detail - for House (or anyone with the kind of strong character) to be in this kind of relentionship he would have to be broken first. Moron.
I enjoyed how you portrayed Wilson's guilt at what he was doing and his inner turmoil. And once again, your apprehensive House is wonderful work.
Can't say much about the whipping. Not something I agree with.
Yah know, I just noticed something. For someone who thinks about everything so much, Wilson's sure as Hell making a lot of mistakes. Which also is a plus for this story (sorry, House), instead of showing him as the perfectly wise person knowing exactly what to do to make everything right. I like how you made his seem more human, despite a stupid one. ^__^

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson's definitely making a lot of mistakes... though i *do* disagree on the idea of what it would take for house to be a sub... i kind of see him as a secret, but *natural* sub... generally those who seem to need to be in control the most in a public setting are those who get the most out of a sub sexual relationship like this... it's good for him to be able to relinquish that control to someone, at some point...

thanx, love, glad you enjoyed the chapter... the next one is up now, hope you like :) *hugs*

[jennybliss.livejournal.com]

Wow! They both have a long way to go. I think it was good that Wilson was able to show House his feelings about the punishment. You can tell how hard it was on Wilson. I think that it was good that they waited until the end of the day. Wilson was no longer angry and House had time to think about why he was being punished. Trust is such a big thing for them. I am not sure that there is a better way for Wilson to punish House. He is not a child and you can't take away his TV or video games. They are both consenting adults. House has agreed to this.

Another great one. *hugs*

[(Anonymous)]

"I am not sure that there is a better way for Wilson to punish House. He is not a child and you can't take away his TV or video games. They are both consenting adults. House has agreed to this."

yeah maybe but given the fact house was a victim of childhood abuse i really wonder if this sort of punishment was the wisest thing wilson could have done...i'm just glad it seemed as hard on him emotionally as it was physically on house.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I think the difficulty Wilson and House both had with this should suggest to Wilson that it just isn't the right way to go about things - however good his intentions might be. (though i am glad that Wilson at least saw sense and waited until they got home!)

Giving House the pills was a good move I think and showed much more understanding on Wilsons part - House just needs to know that he has options, that he won't be left in pain. Now hopefully House will be feel able to go to Wilson and talk about it if he feels he needs to take another pill.

It would also be nice if Wilson looked for other things that might relieve House's pain besides the pills...

Great chapter in this very interesting story :)

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson is trying... but he's not quite got it yet... glad you enjoyed this update, love :)*Hugs* the next one is up now, hope you like :)

[jackssilverwolf.livejournal.com]

Another terrific chapter, as always. And as always, I am so conflicted between the two boys. Can`t wait for more!

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

thanx, love, glad you are, as you're meant to be ;) hehehe... the next one is up now, hope you like it :) *Hugs*

[mireya-11.livejournal.com]

_{You're evil
and this icon is sarcastic and ironic as hell}

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

lolol.... thanx, love :) next chapter is up now :)

[feanix.livejournal.com]

Poor boys...

It was interesting to see some of House's reactions here...Especially at the end when Wilson's talking about the pills, you can almost see it all sinking into House's mind. Very vivid stuff.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

thanx so much, love, glad you enjoyed it... they're gradually making some progress, even though they're both still makign a lot of mistakes :( the next chapter is up now, love, hope you like it :) *Hugs*

[evila-elf.livejournal.com]

Oh, Wilson, you idiot. <--Said with fondness.

I could really feel what he was going through, and I understand how he couldn't back down, not after he had that one time.

And he gave House his pills back! Not sure who was more shocked, House or I. Really smart move on his part, and I hopes he rethinks his methods of punishment since he is finding it so difficult to carry through with them.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson really needs some help here :P glad you enjoyed the update, love *hugs* the next one is up now :)

[dawningmama.livejournal.com]

Oh, Wilson, get thee to a Dom-support group! You're gonna break! Maybe Chase can put him in touch with Annette (from Love Hurts).

You're doing a lovely job and really getting me to root for the boys to work this all out. I think the dynamic and physical punishment can work for them, but the training/learning is really so hard on everyone.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yep.. they both have a ways to go to get this right... cause right now they're both messing up (especially wilson) ... glad you enjoyed the update, love *hugs* the next one is up now :)

[jadzia7667.livejournal.com]

This is good. Realistic, too, although Wilson didn't have to crop him hard enough to draw blood. A difference in force is the difference between a reminder that stays with you, and a welt that draws blood. However, it's realistic, because I didn't expect Wilson to have enough control yet to know the difference.

I'm not a fan of rage driven corporal punishment, but this wasn't rage driven, so it works in the story. Having Wilson in tears during the punishment worked very well for me, because he really doesn't want to inflict pain - he does it because he thinks it's what's best for House.

Wilson made a mistake, leaving House alone for even a second in the aftermath. Leaving him alone after the first aid was a better choice. Having the first aid stuff ready and waiting before the punishment even begins, though, would have helped them both, I think. He'll learn, I hope. *can suggest books for his edification* Or perhaps he can find Annette, the Domme from the erotic strangling episode. Chase might know how to get in touch with her.

I do think that Wilson either needs to come up with different punishments, or take a scene to learn a bit more about what he's doing. Growth as a Dom is important.

Your writing style is concise without being clinical, which I always enjoy from you.

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

thanx so much, love, glad you enjoy it :) *hugs*

and yeah, wilson definitely needs some training in how to go about this properly... he is trying, but doesn't have enough good information to do this right, yet...

the next chapter is up now, love, hope you like it :)

*hugs*
DoS

[californiaquail.livejournal.com]

I'll admit, because of the direction you were taking this, I had decided not to read further. But I got bored and curious and generally read all things BSDM in this fandom, so I recently picked it up again.

I have to say that I have zero sympathy for Wilson. He should be crying and he should feel guilty, because he is immoral. I feel as much sympathy for him in this chapter as I did when he went back into House's office in the season 4 finale and asked House to do the DBS.

He is going about this absolutely wrong. He is demanding trust from someone who has no reason at all to trust him. This is just after Wilson turned House into the cops to get his car back and left House lying on the floor of his apartment, correct? Granted that Wilson has no reason to trust House either. But after that enormous blow up, that Wilson would think he was the one who was in a position to making demands actually confuses me greatly.

He's given no consideration to House's feelings, or the reasons he might have for his objections. He is punishing abuse of pain medication by enflicting more physical pain. That in itself makes no sense.

House is not going to play the victim or beg for dispensation. He's going to let Wilson do whatever he wants, because ultimately, he doesn't want him to leave. To me, that is very sad, but expected from someone who has a history of abuse. Given your own personal experiences that you have referenced in the past, I would think that your position on the matter would be very close to mine.

Once again, House won't really be happy. And he'll think the best he deserves is someone who is offering to love him conditionally. That is in essence what Wilson is saying "I will love you and be with you if you obey me, stop taking so many pills and are willing to put your life in my hands". That is not something that you just ask for. It has to be earned and reached after much mutual disclosure and communication. Wilson has no reason to expect it. He has no concept of what he's asking.

Wilson lording his very presence over House as bait is in itself immoral. Saying he will only stay if House does such and such is immoral. I trust that's why you're posting this to dark!Wilson in the first place. But I still find it disturbing, because the way you're writing it, it feels like you're expecting the readers to think Wilson is doing a good thing for House, and sorry, but he isn't. He might have good intentions in that he really thinks House is a danger to himself and needs to be less reckless. But what is doing about it is wrong and I cannot see House (if written in character) allowing this to continue for too much longer without having to put his proverbial foot down.

[(Anonymous)]

"it feels like you're expecting the readers to think Wilson is doing a good thing for House, and sorry, but he isn't."

Wilson IS doing a good thing for House. house is such a stubborn man, wilson has to choose a special way to help him deal with his problems.

And as the past events show, House is not able to stop overdoing with the pills.

and I had to continue, because of the word length...

[californiaquail.livejournal.com]

Wilson deciding in advance that certain things will earn certain punishments is fine. But he hasn't done that. He hasn't said, if you do this and only this, these specific things will happen. It's too ambiguous. He said House could choose the tool that is used to punish him, but Wilson is the one who provided him with the options. Not much of a choice. He never addressed why House reacted the way he did to seeing the belt, and even when he suspected that House might be emotionally traumatized by what was happening, he did it anyway. This implies a lack of concern for his partner, which is key in any dom sub relationship. Maintaining control is important, but not at the cost of the other person's comfort and dignity. That is not what it is about.

This seems to be more about Wilson wanting to control House, wanting to rob him of his right to make choices, even about his own body, and wanting to fix him so that he will be the way he thinks House should be. He is basically saying that House isn't capable of deciding these things and needs to have someone else do it for him -except that Wilson hasn't made the greatest decisions either and is in no position to be telling anyone to do anything.

Conducting corporal punishment in a controlled environment is fine -in a dom sub relationship, or even a parent child relationship. Structure and rules and mutual trust are very important. Suddenly grabbing House by the hair when he responds in a way that Wilson doesn't like is wrong, because House had no way to avoid it and could not have seen it coming. It implies cruelty and a desire to just inflict pain, just so the other person knows that you can hurt them whenever you want, if you want to.

Interfering with House's work life by telling people in advance not to give him drugs and basically making him out to be a junkie is hugely intrusive and also damaging to House's dignity and professional reputation. Wilson has given no consideration to House's actual pain needs. He has arbitrarily decided how many pills he thinks House is entitled to.

Anyway -basically Wilson is fucking this up royally. I'm just hoping that as you are writing this, you realize that and don't actually think that Wilson is doing the right thing or that he's even close to being right about his methods. And I really hope that we will see some sign of self-respect on House's part very soon, because he does not deserve to be treated this way and he is entitled to better. I am REALLY hoping that is where you are headed with this fic -hope hope hope *crosses fingers*

Re: and I had to continue, because of the word length...

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

again, love, i appreciate your thoughts on this, and taking so much time to share them :P you may or may not agree with where this story ends up, but for me, it's all about the ride/journey to get there... hope you enjoy it

[kirkshomegirl61.livejournal.com]

I feel I will be in the minority here. I think a lot of your readers have little knowledge of true abuse. Some are just bleeding hearts. House's father never disciplined him with love. He wanted to break him so he would know who was boss. A small child,jerked by the arm and being beaten with an object,or picked up and placed in ice water or locked out side is a terrible thing esp with some one you love and that is supposed to protect you. There is no recourse and in a child like House it would only serve to promote more rebellion as he grew and promote a lack of trust in those who say they love him.
House knows he is out of control. He knows he can't do this with out Wilson. He knows Wilson loves him and in all probability Wilson would never leave. Everyone needs boundaries,House has none, but he craves them,knowing how far he can go. That is why he agreed to this and while 5 licks on his back is painful, he will remember that his behavior caused Wilson to need to punish him and that it made Wilson cry.
A punishment agreed on for an offense, explained in advance and carried out in private at the best time for the recipient, followed by love and care and forgiveness is not bad. House should have learned from this. He will remember that Wilson really did what was best.
House is a grown man. Key word man. Physical punishment is normally the best to get their attention. Don't ever use sex as a weapon,can't take away his toys, can't ground him. He will remember and think next time. However, he may have to test many times before he believes in the love.

[(Anonymous)]

Thats EXACTLY what I am thinking too!!!

[cathepsut.livejournal.com]

Oh boy, this made me cringe. Can Wilson really be this clueless? Looking forward to the next installment! I think I need to find some H/W-porn now to relieve some tension! ;-)
BTW, I love reading all the comments just as much as the story. Fascinating stuff...

(sorry, replied to another comment before instead of to the actual post...)

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

hehehe... yeah, i enjoy the discussion generated by the comments :) glad you're enjoying both, love :) *Hugs* and yeah, wilson could use some help ;) the next chapter is up now, hope you enjoy it :) *Hugs*

[moz17.livejournal.com]

Oh gosh, again this was horrific to read but so perfectly written. I think Wilson has made a desperate mistake with this one but in a round about sort of way, things seem to be getting better. THings have cleared up a but about the Vicodin anyway. x

[dreamsofspike.livejournal.com]

yeah, wilson's making a lot of mistakes, but he's trying to do what's right for house... i think he's just not really sure what that it :-S thanx, love, glad you enjoyed this update :) *hugs*